Ass-Random Observations from My Sickbed

So, yeah, as you can guess from the title, I'm sick. But what's really important here is the weird shit that for some reason, I'm remembering.

One of my roommates plays Starcraft roughly every waking second of his free time. He has honed his skills at playing the Terran race, and while half-listening, I have misheard some interesting dialog from these space-rednecks:

• "Odors, sir!"
• "Elijah 2, sir!"
• "S.O.B. Good to go, sir!"
• "In the butt, bi, bi, bi."
• "Go ahead, jackoff."

The theme from Jeopardy is actually a perverse, corrupted rearrangement of "I'm a Little Teapot."

The basic rhythm similarities between "La Cucaracha" and "Clementine" are disturbing.

Microsoft is probably the only company that could easily be said to have been named after its founder's penis.

Ants are fucking annoying.

I want an electric skateboard.

If you think I'm going to end this post without some reference to feces, then you don't know shit!